This is Me
Hi there! I’m Alexandra (Alex). I’m a wife, a daughter, a mother of two, a sibling of ten, and a servant of the One true God.
Some of my favorites:
- Christian Artist: Phil Wickham
- Current song on replay: Lean Back by Maverick City Music
- Book of the Bible: John, Acts, Romans, and Hebrews (It’s hard to choose. I love them all!)
- Bible Verse: Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Romans 12:12 ESV
- Preacher: David Wilkerson
My Childhood
I was born in California, the eighth child of eleven total. I grew up Catholic, but I didn’t practice the religion much. There were talks of God, and I prayed to God, but we didn’t frequent church services. My mom and dad separated when I was about eight. My memory is a little blurry regarding the exact ages. My sisters and I (six of us) ended up in the foster care system soon after until my mom fought to get us back home.
When the man who became my stepdad came into the picture, he was charming and caring, the nicest guy until he wasn’t. My mom and seven of us girls spent the next ten years living with a psychopath. Years spent living with this person left me damaged and broken.
Finding Hope
I met my now husband while working at a fast-food restaurant. He introduced me to Jesus. I remember sitting in his car weeping. I was suicidal and so angry at God. My soul had been crushed. I’d never hurt so deeply. I didn’t understand why my family had experienced so much suffering at the hands of the man who was supposed to be a father figure. I didn’t believe a loving God would have allowed so much pain in my life. My husband spoke to me about the love of Jesus and led me through the sinner’s prayer. I didn’t understand it much, but now I know a seed was planted that day.
However, I still felt lost; things didn’t change overnight. Perhaps I had doubts about how God could help me. In my anger, I acted in ways I thought would offend Him. I even renounced His existence. I remember my mom being so upset about this.
One day, I was in my room sobbing. I wanted to die. I remember talking to God. “You’re not real! If you were real, none of this would have happened!” The Lord gave me a vision because of His amazing grace and love. I found myself in a dark tunnel. The absence of light was unquestionable. I remember thinking how strange this was. This tunnel began to extend; It became longer and longer. At the very end of the tunnel, a little speck of light appeared; it was bright. This light expanded and became the shape of a man. It shone so brightly, like nothing I’d ever seen. Then I heard a voice say, “I’m real. I’m here, and I love you.” I felt something enveloping me in a peace I’d never felt! I remember smiling and falling asleep with so much peace. I believe wholeheartedly that I had a vision while awake; the Holy Spirit spoke to me. I am so thankful God chose to reveal Himself to me that day; He didn’t have to, but He chose to. I didn’t deserve it. Thank you, Lord!
A New Life
Soon after, I started attending a Christian (Baptist) church with Dan. I remember crying during the song service. The Holy Spirit used those lyrics to stir something in my heart, and the sermons appeared to have been written just for me. Unfortunately, it would take me twenty years to answer God’s call of devotion to Him. Why are we so stubborn? He was faithful in many ways during those twenty years in the waiting. He kept gently drawing me back to Himself, and I am eternally grateful! During those twenty years, Dan and I had two kids. We experienced a turbulent marriage, found a wonderful Pentecostal church, and re-dedicated our lives to Christ. God restored our marriage, and our love for each other was renewed. We learned to forgive and to examine ourselves and that prayer is important! And now, I am writing a blog hoping to magnify Jesus and lead others to Him because I know He’s the answer.
For two decades, the Lord has been trying to teach me this: prioritizing our relationship with the Lord through reading His Word, spending time in prayer, and submitting ourselves to Him is the most important thing in this world.
I’ll admit that it took me being in a desperate situation to finally give in to doing what the Holy Spirit had called me for years. His grace, mercy, and love have sustained me and taught me so much about who He is and what He expects of us as Christ’s followers. I am a work in progress. I pray He will keep me humble, that this blog will always bring glory to God, and that He will use it to help others walk with Jesus. Glory to Him, who can soften the hardest hearts and transform lives through the blood of Jesus. Amen.
The enemy of our souls tried to destroy me from the time I was a child, but praise be to God, who, by his mercy, called my name and drew me to Him. I’ve overcome because of Jesus and am eternally grateful for his goodness.
More of my story will be woven into blog posts, so do not miss them. I pray God will take this blog where He needs it. May you be blessed by these posts.
I like you 20 years ago I came out of sin and rededicated my life to the Lord. I promised my family that I would listen to only Christian music. And that changed me and my family, but it wasn’t until I became a truck driver that I started reading my Bible and that has changed me dramatically. I still struggle but the grace of the Lord and his Mercy I love Jesus I love him so much thank you for your testimony you encouraged me and my wife more than you know you are a big encouragement thank you..
Steve, I’m so thankful for His grace and mercy. Thank you for sharing some of your testimony. Sometimes, we don’t realize that difficult circumstances or jobs that don’t seem ideal are great opportunities to draw near to the Lord.